One of the reasons I jumped all in and set this wildly crazy goal to quit drinking for a year is because I read a book titled Unfu*k Yourself by Gary John Bishop. At work I look forward to my team's yearly book study that always encourages personal growth. We read Bishop's book in the spring of 2018 and I found it to be extremely motivating. Because I work in an environment filled with young children, my boss gave the book a clever new name, UnLEASH Yourself. Reading this was so motivating that I put my goal into action shortly after finishing the book.
The first line on the back of the book reads, “What’s standing in the way of you living your best life?” The front cover of the book has the subtitle "Get out of your head and into your life" and includes some very poignant words such as: feelings, history, excuses, opinions, beliefs, judgments, self-doubt, fears, tears, and reasons. Unfu*k Yourself (buy it here on Amazon) helps you realize that the main barrier between success and failure is truly YOU and that you need to get out of your head. Bishop explains that if you are ready to change your life and to take hold of that freedom you’ve been missing, there are two things you need to do, STOP doing what you are currently doing and START taking the actions to propel you forward.
If it comes down to two simple words- STOP & START –why does it seem so hard?
STOP what you are currently doing.
Before I read this book, I was totally in my head and could never fathom doing a yearlong goal like this. I had no problem making excuses on why I couldn’t stop drinking or why it wasn’t the perfect time. In my head I was saying things like:
“I want to try cutting back on booze but I so many fun parties coming up and I have this great vacation so this definitely is not the right time.”
“When I am less busy at work and I am not as stressed I will totally quit drinking.”
“This Mama NEEDS her wine, I have tweens in my house. Need I say more?”
“I can’t start this goal now because I have too many other things I am working on.”
“I want to quit drinking but I just love how a beers tastes when I am hanging out by the pool.”
“I can’t stop now because I have FOMO (AKA- Fear of missing out). I don’t want to be around other people who seem like they are having so much fun while they are drinking.
Surely, someone can relate to me here? Essentially, I needed to STOP just thinking about the idea and to STOP sitting around waiting for the right time or the right mood to strike. Bishop's book motivated me to get past the excuses and just get up and DO it.
START taking the actions to propel you forward.
When I started my yearlong journey the question I got asked most often was, “what was your trigger and why did you just all the sudden do this?” The truth is, thanks to encouragement I got from Unfu*k Yourself, I didn’t think much about it. I just made a decision and just took the plunge. Once I made the decision then I spent a little more time planning out what I wanted to achieve and mapped out steps on how to get there but most importantly I just STARTED. Carl Jung said, “You are what you do, not what you say you’ll do.” I was able to START because I was willing, I embraced the uncertainty of what the whole year will look like, and I decided to be relentless in pursuing my goal.
Seize the moment.
I highly recommend checking out the book Unfu*k Yourself if you want a little kick in the ass to get started working toward a goal. In a blunt way, the author, Gary John Bishop, basically calls you out on your shit and pushes you toward action. Bishops last few words in the book read,
“Don’t let your mind control you any longer. Stop letting it hold you back with it excuses and distractions and worries. You are not your thoughts. You are your actions. You are what you do. And your actions are the only thing separating you from where you are and where you want to be.”